Dull

So I went through my bf's phone again, it's been about a month since I've done this. I've been able to trust him more since at the beginning I haven't seen anything wrong. Sure there've been times that a text was deleted here and there, chats that he didn't show me, but it's mostly been okay. Gradually I've gotten to the stage in at now where I only occasionally check it instead of every night like I used to. It's not like I'm not allowed to, he says I have access to everything, and I do have all his passwords. Just to show that he's not cheating on me again. But I didn't mean to but I did accidentally click on one of his convos with one of his guy friends (maybe one of his closest friends) and I may be taking it as a big deal, but it's a big step from nothing at all.. While we went to his stepdads birthday party at this buffet (relatives and friends are there too), he apparently sent a text to him saying "yo idk who this girl is but she been hanging around the family a lot. Hot asf." His friend then responds by "smh lol". Then he sends the pic of the whole fam and the pic includes me so that's why idk if he's kidding or not. Because all my bf types after that is "she gotta booty" then the convo ends. It strikes a nerve cuz the convo seems to end exactly there without saying who the girl is. If he's joking and saying its me or not. I may be overthinking but lately I've been feeling distant from him. Like he resents me because atm I don't have a job and I'm not going to school, etc. I also feel like our interests have really strayed apart. He doesn't give a shit about my interests and I try my best to keep up with his and talk about it but obv I'm not as smart as he is when it comes to all the stuff he knows. So rn I ended up overthinking and didn't get much sleep.. I had to fake myself last night.. I don't know if he wants me here anymore.. 

Yes, I am stressed out about a lot of other things and that could be why I'm like this and probably paranoid but.. He doesn't really even seem to care.. I mean he is the one that's working so I really shouldn't be complaining about anything right? 

I hate my s.a.d. because rn I really wish I had someone to talk to about this stuff but I don't.. All my btwn friends and acquaintance people are friends/acquaintances through him so.. Sigh..